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Ah Ganito Pala ‘Yun…

November 20, 2009
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Have you ever thought of becoming a dad (or a mom) in the future? I mean really, a lot of us are eyeing to becoming one before, especially during those times when we’re just starting to feel attracted to the opposite sex, getting-to-know stages, and then becoming BF/GF in the process. I even recall telling myself na minsan for the particular girl that I am currently steady with, it’s always my inkling to assume that I will marry her and have kids later on. Most of us guys would probably agree to that premise. However, sometimes in the process of discovering about your GF (or BF), this statement often doesn’t happen, especially when you guys eventually break up, or worse… become indifferent towards each other.

In my experience, I’ve gone to four serious relationships (one during high school, one in college, 2 post-college a.k.a. working na), most of which averaging 2-4years at most. So as in serious talaga! And among the 4, two only have I thought of, well, probably ending up sana. The 3rd one was the almost likely candidate whom I thought of ending up down the aisle. Yet, there was something that I wasn’t sure of myself back then. I didn’t know if it was about the situation or some external factors, or was I ready for it, or was she ready for it, or there’s somebody that I miss out. And funny thing ‘cuz I was already on the stage of making plans with the 3rd one. Sad to say, I eventually broke up with her. And honestly, it turned out to be a good thing (sorry about her, baka you guys might think I’m an insensitive A-hole because of that!)

So where does the dream of becoming a dad came into the picture? Right after the last breakup. And did I really look forward of becoming one since I got married last January 2005. Well actually even before i got married, I’ve always longed to become a Dad really. You see, my wife had a kid back then. And I remember the first time I visited her at her home in Sta. Rosa, Laguna, I already fell in love with her daughter. After that, I always dreamt of how it would feel like if I did became her dad. I even used to tell my friends back in Manila that someday, I am going to be someone she’ll call Dad. Surprisingly, the Lord had His ways of making things happen, and true enough, things just fell into place. I married my Kaye in January 2005 (whom I’ve had a super-dooper, ultimate, unwavering CRUSH for 9 years), and by right of marriage, Kaye’s daughter Kara becomes my stepkid. It’s truly an unexplainable feeling that the girl you’ve dreamt of having kids with, now becomes your circle of life. Much more than this is the knowledge that I did became a father to someone so precious and beautiful, even if you’re not biologically related. I tell you, not all guys with go the same way that I did.

Now, 4 years later, Kaye & I were blessed with two more chikitings, Jeremy and Cassie. And with 3 loving kids, who wouldn’t say a life like is not blessed and ultimately rewarding. In fact, I never guessed that fatherhood would be as this fun and gratifying, despite the difficulties you get to encounter everyday. So when I go back to those times, thinking about that same question I asked myself over and over… “Ano kaya ang feeling na maging isang tatay?” I guess this is how it feels. Parang you always look forward to something more… like more time to spend with the family, more opportunities to enjoy the simple joys with the family I love so dearly. And ultimately, I thank Kaye for that. With a long-standing feeling that was kept for so long, I am so grateful that she help me realized the life I truly wanted.

So for all budding Dads out there, or for those who are still contemplating with the same questions I asked myself before, just read on. And hopefully at the end of this story, you’d realize that becoming a Dad is something worth it. So “paano ang feeling na maging isang Tatay? Ah, ganito pala ‘yun…!”

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27 Comments leave one →
  1. November 20, 2009 12:50p11

    Mahirap maging isang ama. Lahat ng ikagaganda at ikabubuti ng isang pamilya ay nakasalalay kung papaano panghahawakan ng isang lalake ang kanyang responsibilidad bilang, lalake, asawa, tatay at isang mamamayan.

    Bago pa magkaroong ng isang matatag na republika ang isang bansa, may isang ama na ang namamahala sa kanyang nasasakupan- ang kanyang pamilya.

    Taas noo po ako sa lahat ng mga RESPONSABLENG AMA.

    Bongkito, ikinagagalak ko ang pagbabahagi mo ng iyong sarili dito sa ating mundo..mundo ng isip na pwedeng pumukaw sa mga natutulog na imahinasyon.

    • November 23, 2009 12:50p11

      salamat sa iyong pagbisita J.Kulisap. sa totoo lang, lahat talaga tayo ay may malaking responsibilidad sa buhay, lalo pa’t sa pamilya natin. kaya’t nuong ako’y dumating sa puntong ganap na ama na ‘ko, kahit alam ko ga’no man kahirap ay gagawa at gagawa ako ng paraan para lang mabigyan sila ng magandang buhay, lalo na ang mga bata.

      ikinagagalak kong maging kabahagi ka ng aking mga kwento. i-add kita sa blogroll ko po…

      • November 23, 2009 12:50p11

        Napakahusay.

        Magsilbi ka pang inspirasyon sa lahat ng ama, sa lahat ng nangangarap na maging ama.

        • November 23, 2009 12:50p11

          sana nga… ang layunin ko lang naman ay maibahagi ko ang aking saloobin at damdamin tungkol dito dahil sa totoo lang, iba ‘pag first time. at di ko mailarawan ang saya na magampanan ang isang tungkulin na buong buhay ng nakabansag sa aking pangalan.

          ikaw ba ay isang ama na rin?

  2. November 20, 2009 12:50p11

    Hi Kuya Bong! Wah. Ang cute. Nakakakilig po kayo. Ang galing, 9 years nyo siyang crush? Grabe! Talagang naghold on kayo. Magawa nga yun. :p

    Joke! Hahaha! Ang cute nyo po talagang dalawa. 😀 You’re a perfect fit for each other. Kyaaaaaa! *melts*

    Swerte naman ni Kara at Ate Kaye. 🙂

    • November 23, 2009 12:50p11

      hello aina! salamat at nakabisita ka na rin sa aking tambayan. at nakakatuwang isipin na nakukyutan ka sa ming dal’wa ni Ate Kaye mo.

      Yup! Unconsciously, i held on to that idea na baka maging kami. Imagine, naging asawa ko pa! kaya sobrang rewarding for me! kung ako nagawa namin yun, why not? tutal bata ka pa, marami ka pang pagdadaanan. basta ‘wag muna masyado seryoso sa lab-lab ha (kung meron man heheh!) importante you get to finish and work after. by then, no holds barred kang magkarelasyon that’s fine. as long as aware ka sa sarili mo and where you intend to end up in the future (teka mali dating a!) i mean basta every relationship has its purpose, and sana, if ever, it’s happy everafter!

      o wait! add kita sa roll ko ha? thanks for dropping by! 😀

      • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

        Wahaha, sorry po kung super late na nito Kuya Bong. Sobrang busy talaga eh. T______T Ang cute nyo po kaya? Di kayo nacucute-an sa inyo? 😀

        I don’t want commitments pa naman eh. Hehe. Pa-crush crush pati infatuation lang every now and then. Ayoko naman po ng nasasaktan lagi eh. :p Pero you’re really really lucky kasi nagbunga ang paghohold on nyo. 😀

        Sana magtagal po kayo forever and ever! Yeheeeey! 😀 Ang cute talagaaaaa! 😀

  3. November 23, 2009 12:50p11

    nangarap din akong magkapamilya,magkaroon ng mga anak, at butihin na asawa, akala ko yung last bf ko sya na yung binigay ni Lord for me, na kasama kong haharap sa altar, but pangarap lang pala yun..
    well, sana masabi ko yung tittle mu na ” Ah, ganito pala ‘yun…!” in nanay version.. hehe

    padaan lang po galing sa bahay ni Ms. Kaye..

    • kaye permalink
      November 23, 2009 12:50p11

      hay, pretty PD, i have no doubt na isang araw, masasabi mo yan. at by that time, naniniwala akong magiging isang mabuti kang nanay. 🙂

      • November 23, 2009 12:50p11

        hello Ms. Kaye!( napangiti dahil nabasa ang “pretty” hehe) salamat naman po! gagawin ko talaga to be the best mom ever! haha, may (ganun?! ) hubby nyu po pala si Mr. Bongkito?! katuwa naman. 🙂

        be safe po sa both of you!

        • November 24, 2009 12:50p11

          impluwensiya ni Kaye kaya ako nandito ngayon. and frankly, am starting to enjoy my tambayan. kasi may mga bago akong nakikilala every now and then.

          fyi, si Kaye — she’s the greatest Mom i’ve ever met, and i’m glad she’s the best Mom my kids could ever ask for. 🙂

    • November 24, 2009 12:50p11

      hi PD! salamat sa iyong pagtambay. ganon talaga minsan. akala natin yung dumating sa tin na nakabighani ng ating damdami’t isipan ay s’ya na. ganyan din ako kay Kaye noon. pero imagine, matagal man na panahon na nagkakausap, nagkita, o pagsususulyap na di ko naisip na maging kami bilang BF/GF, tuwa ako ng lubos na s’ya pa rin pala ang aking makakatuluyan. don’t worry about it. darating talaga ang para s’yo. just enjoy what you have now if you’re still single. marami ka pang makikita at am sure when that time comes, sulit sa paghihintay. by then, masasabi mo tlaga na “ganito pala ‘yun…”

      patambay minsan sa s’yo ha PD? tenks!

  4. November 24, 2009 12:50p11

    hello Mr. Bongkito! mahirap nga talagang umasa sa akala, haha, hindi naman ako masyadu worry eh. hehe enjoy nga muna kung anu ang merun ako now, and who ever he is, i know we both belong to each other! oha?! hehehe!

    sure sure! welcome po anytime!! 🙂

    • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

      and i’m sure for you there are a lot of guys who would make their way to win you. i know patience is a virtue, but with a humble heart and good looks, aba e, ewan ko na lang kung di sila mangulit s’yo! hehehe

      tenks ulit sa pagtambay! btw, i like your I Miss You blog… yup something i can relate to. 😀

      • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

        morning kuya. ayan, kuya napo tawag ko seo.. hehehe( filing close?hehe)

        ay,nakadalaw kana pala sa blog ko, thnx naman po.. lahat ata nakaka relate don.. hehe..

        and yup, patience is a virtue talaga.. 🙂

        tc po!

  5. lababo permalink
    November 25, 2009 12:50p11

    ayun o, wumowordpress na rin si kuya bong!
    welcome! at natuwa ako sa nabasa ko. inspired. yeyebonel!
    pwedeng paampon ako sa inyo? lol

    • lababo permalink
      November 25, 2009 12:50p11

      mukhang ewan na naman ang gravatar ko. wahaha

      • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

        hehehe! oks lang ‘yan! at least kaw na kaw yan! hehehe! sana di ka naman barado ha?!?

        jok jok jok! 😀

    • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

      hey lababo! tenks! sobrang nakakainspire ba? well, kahit ako di ko rin naman alam na mangyayari ‘yang ganyang takbo sa aking layp! pero thankfully, at nangyari nga s’ya! ikanga, masarap ang mainspire sa isang taong inaasam mong makasama. pero kung maganap ang gusto mong mangyari sa inyong dalawa (hindi yun a! hehehe!), di lang inspirasyon but all the benefits of a wonderful relationship ang matatamasa mo araw-araw!

      hopefully, you continue to hone that inspiration. malay mo makamit mo yung gusto mo in time…

      tenks sa pagbisita. add kita ser ha!

      • lababo permalink
        November 25, 2009 12:50p11

        add add add!
        swakto kasi yung post. gusto ko na kasing magkababy. kaso bata pa ako at di ko pa kaya ang resposibilities. nakwento ko na rin yun sa blog ko pati ke mommy kaye.

        di yan barado a, may liquid sosa yan. haha

        • November 25, 2009 12:50p11

          hehehe malamang! mukhang malakas ang pagbaba ng tubig e. buti malinis ‘yun tubig ha! kung hindi, eeeeewwwweee wats day plowting?!?

          nyahahah!

          • lababo permalink
            November 25, 2009 12:50p11

            aha, parang hindi na ata lababo yun pag may nagfofloating na! haha

  6. December 2, 2009 12:50p12

    salamat sa pagbisita sa aking blog bongkitz! napadaan ako kanina by surprise para bisitahin si kaye at si kara. hehe hindi kita natyempuhan. di bale, marami pa naman sigurong next time….

    hehe, naalala ko tuloy na noong ako ay college, ang unang thesis na sinulat ko ay entitled “fatherhood is a joyful experience!”

  7. December 9, 2009 12:50p12

    o diba, masarap na mahirap, kasi ako bukod sa nanay e tatay din kaya nakakarelate haha.
    proud naman ako at the same time naiinggit pag merong mga responsible father na kagaya mo, pero ok lang kahit na di ako napagkalooban ng isang kagaya mo e bawing bawi na dun sa aking anak, di naman lahat ng gusto na tin e nakukuha natin diba?
    pagka naman lahat ng magagandang bagay e nasatin na, kawawa naman yung iba na maubusan na hahaha.
    congrats at goodluck sa isang ama at asawang kagaya mo.

    • December 10, 2009 12:50p12

      d’yan ako bilib sa mga babaeng tulad mo Lee! dati si Kaye ganyan din prior sa pagpasok ko sa eksena ng buhay nya. siguro pinalad lang talaga ako at love na love ko lang din si kara kaya eto magkasama na kami for good. sulit din yung maghintay ng 8 years diba?!? heheh

      but true sa anak mo pa lang iba na ang ligayang malalasap ng pagiging isang ina at ama rolled into one. sulit sa hirap ng pagtatrabaho at pag-aaruga, na sinusuklian ng mga munting halik at pagsabi ng I love you mula sa kanila. walang katumbas ang pagmamahal ng anak sa ‘tin. at dahil dyan, proud ako sa mga moms na tulad mo.

      hope to meet you one of these days. at salamat sa pagtambay! 😀

  8. February 22, 2010 12:50p02

    Aha! Ayun pala ang love story nyo. Bakit hindi ko ito naback-read kay Ms Kaye? hehe

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